The Letter S

For the longest time the letter s was important.  It was how she said yes with a long extended “s”.  It was how she hissed like a snake.  It was how she responded to Brown Bear Brown Bear what do you…? “ssssss”.  It was the one sound she’s been able to call upon consistently since she started talking and then lost her words.

Today I realized that that too is all but gone.  Maybe she was just having an off day, but it’s been harder and harder for her to make the sound for a few months now.  Today, she just stared at me when I asked with her eyes welling up with struggle.  She mustered an “f”, and I told her good job, before I had to leave, lest my eyes well up too.  She used to count with me and do the ABCs.  Now, she’s left with “f”s and “p”s.

Though recently our speech therapist started using a technique called Prompt and at the same time we started on yet another supplement – Coq10 and all of a sudden Maggie’s been making all kinds of noises.  There’s a longer list of supplements and therapeutic interventions we’re yet to try, but if this is the result, we’re going to try them all.  Eventually there will be a treatment.  And when there is, she’ll be able to say “s” again.

I don’t expect her to use her words until we can find a treatment or a cure.  But it was always nice to hear them, even if they were really just letters.  Now I’m content just to be able to hear her voice.

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